The Bachelor.....I'm weak, what can i say?

I wasn't going to do it, I really wasn't. But the show was just too good. I know, i know, I vowed to never again watch the show after Brad Womack jipped us all and dumped DeAnna, but whatever....so my word's no good. Big deal. :)

Where do I begin....how about the Bachelor himself, Matt Grant (lame name, if you ask me).
I'm feeling pretty ambivalent about him so far. I think he is charming, seems intelligent, and is surprisingly comfortable to watch. He doesn't seem to feel awkward, so I don't feel as awkward. His accent is hot, but that's a given. It's weird though, sometimes I found him quite attractive, and other times not at all. I think when he smiles, his mouth and teeth make him look a bit chipmunky. But let's be honest, this show is no longer really even about the Bachelor--it's about all the skanky girls!

All I can say, is enough with all the antics and desperate attempts at attention!! Did Jerry Springer become a producer on this show?? Take note, ladies, the first impression rose went to who? Oh, that's right, a very low-key, easy-going girl who wasn't making a complete fool out of herself! I mean, honestly....while tearing a chunk of an aluminum can with your teeth is actually pretty awesome, perhaps it shouldn't be done in an evening gown--save that talent for a college frat party! For the most part, I thought all the girls were sub par. No one really stuck out in my mind, except the crazies, so let's address those girls now, shall we?

Marshana--
Our little Indian pageant princess, born and raised in Brooklyn. Oh, that's right, she's not Indian....she's from the hood. So what was up with the international flair in that costume? And from the previews, it is going to be hilarious to watch little miss pageant bust out the street talk from the ghetto. I'm laughing already.

Michele--From Laguna Niguel.
Two things: This picture does you way more justice than real life.....and way to represent my hometown(cringe).

Rebecca--
Remember, she was the one in that red and white strapless dress, who busted out her awful dancing skills? Umm, yeah, note to you. You're 30, and your desperate attempt to grind and dance provocatively is such a transparent attempt to come across as a young, party girl. It was painful to watch, and lucky for us, we won't have to anymore because you went home. So sad.....but not really at all.

Michelle P.--
Oh Michelle, where do I begin? Once a band dork, always a band dork. Now some might argue since I play the viola and was in the "dorchestra" my whole life, Michelle P. and I are cut from the same dorky cloth. But I vehemently disagree. First of all, Michelle, you honestly thought it would be hot to bust out the freaking clarinet, where your licking the reed and lathering up your instrument with spit? Yeah, that's hot. Oh, and good thing you strapped on that pretty neck strap--was she nervous she might drop her instrument during a two minute song? I don't care if she plays that clarinet like Kenny G--bottom line is--she has flaming red hair and actually thought her band talent was cool. 'Nuf said.

Stacey--
Oh Stacey, there are no words to describe the disaster that you are. I think she takes the cake on the crazy's.....that girl was unreal. From the string of exepletives that my brain couldn't even pretend to imagine, to the comments about wanting to invent a pharmaceutical for a disease that no one's ever thought of, to the infamous, disgusting "panty slip." Stacey completely validates to me that the producers of the Bachelor FOR SURE select a few nutballs to go on the show just to make things more exciting and boost the ratings. I mean, c'mon, I'm sure she was drunk during this taping, but even stone cold sober, there is no way in hell a girl that retarded could have gotten through the screening process as a quality candidate for any man on earth!!

There were a few other honorable mentions with some of the other stunts (umm, guitar girl? It's called talent--try getting some) but I'm over typing them all out. Let's just all sit back and watch the crazies carry on. From the preview of all the attitude and nastiness in episodes to come, these gals make me proud to be a woman. :)